Dare to Dream II

Oh and.....

Thu, 28 May 2009 15:03:58 GMT

Oh, and I also joined Twitter.

End of May Update

Thu, 28 May 2009 15:01:28 GMT

I've been working at Fresh Harvest for a few months now. It's very interesting and, well different. The actual chefs don't do any work, you have to take a 30 minute break because you won't get paid if you do work during those 30 minutes, you're pretty much free to do whatever you want, as in make what you want, and of course you have your usual bull shit. I'm just trying to learn as much as I can and since I've started, I've worked my way to the pizza station. I hope this will help me to get a raise/promotion.

I went to a walk in clinic so I could get medicines for my finger. The skin is growing back, but I think there's a layer missing. There's a slight pinkish color to it.

My XB360 died on me about a week ago. So I have to send it in so they can fix it or send me a new one. Currently I am borrowing my father-in-law's system. The box to ship out the broken system should be here today.

My asthma and allergies have been bothering me again, but my insurance just kicked in, so I can start going back to my doctor very soon and I can start taking the good meds again.

loss of skin on finger

Mon, 27 Apr 2009 15:25:40 GMT

Not sure when it happened, but I do know that it was a few weeks ago. I pulled some skin off of my finger while cleaning a cooler at work. It wasn't that bad but it was bleeding and I wanted to put a band aid on it. Since I was at work, I had to use what's there. They had a blue band aid and I thought it was neat. Blue band aid, right? Well, I should have remembered this from my past, but it was one of those extra adhesive band aids. I took a shower with it on and I eventually took it off. The scrape was still there but I lost more skin.

Few weeks go by and I am loosing more skin. Fast forward to the present and the entire lower part of my middle finger is missing the 1st layer of skin (save for a part on the back of the finger). It's red/pinkish skin that is exposed now. I've been using my own band aids on it. It's stayed clean but I'm still missing skin.

I got some advice that I should air it out. I ditched the band aids and now I have a gauze pad on it with a cloth covering that allows it to breath. The gauze is sticking to the open skin, but I think that's natural.

I remembered that I used to get a skin reaction to certain band aids. Sometimes I would get red bumps around the area where the band aid was. It's never been this bad before.

The scrape has healed and I think due to the reaction, the skin that was affected came off in order to make room for new skin.

It's not pretty to look at and I've only shown one person at work (the one who suggested that I air it out). I mean, I'm missing skin on my finger. I've been freaking out off and on about it. It hasn't gotten worse and today I think I noticed some white skin growing back on the pink skin.

I don't have insurance until June so going to the doctor or even the ER is out of the question.

I looked online for some information and it seems that other people tend to have a reaction to certain band aids as well, so I know that I'm not alone.

But it just freaks me out that I'm missing so much skin on my finger. I would take a picture, maybe to better describe it, but it might not be for the faint of heart. If anyone actually wants to see it, just let me know.

On top of that, my body is now fighting a cold.

Heh, I mean , come on, how screwed up do I have to be? My skin falls off because of a band aid that I really didn't need in the first place....

If anyone out there had any ideas to what's going on and any tips, please let me know.

Update

Fri, 10 Apr 2009 15:23:18 GMT

Not really in any order:

1) My dad was in the hospital for a few days. He fell in the kitchen. After the fall he shrugged it off and went to take a nap. After waking up his head was hurting him still, so he went in. They did test and his knees are bad. He's had one bad knee his whole life, but now both of them will need to be replaced eventually. I went to see him a few weeks ago. He's doing a lot better and it seems things are back to normal.

2) Tidus has an ulcer in his eye. Not sure if he got if from playing too rough or getting shampoo in his eye (he likes to jump onto the side of the tub when I take a shower) but after a few days of sleeping a lot and medicine, he's back to normal.

3) I've been working at Fresh Harvest in the Coconut Casino for about a month now. I like it. Hell, I get paid overtime. It's very laid back as in we take care of our area, make our own salads and so on. It's about two miles from where I live so I ride my bike to work and at night have Chris pick me up.

And that's about it, really. Been playing less and less 360 and more CoH again. My Ps3 is even getting dusty. I did play L4D with Andrew and Terrance on the 360 and we really should play more, that game is awesome.

Tidus

Sun, 01 Mar 2009 17:20:50 GMT

My cat Tidus has an ulcer in his eye. :( Yesterday his eye was closed and watery. We waited a day and come this morning it was the same, so we took him to the vet. We got medication for him and he should be okay in about 3 to 5 days.

Job Get!

Fri, 27 Feb 2009 20:19:48 GMT

So I just got a call from HR about my background check.

Long story short, I got me a job!! ^_^

I might have a job

Tue, 24 Feb 2009 15:26:15 GMT

(I wrote this yesterday)
So I got a call today from the HR rep over at the casino. I don't know how I pulled if off, but the restaurant/cafe wants to hire me. Here is a link from the casino's website. I go in tomorrow for a drug test, finger print and background check and as long as that is clean then I'm in. It takes about a week for all the paper work to go through. I'm pretty shocked actually, I thought both interviews were pretty bad and shaky. I was nervous as hell. Maybe I said something that they wanted to hear.

----

Since the place is about 2 miles away, I'm planning on riding my bike there. Said bike hasn't been used in years so it's very rusty and the brakes are shot, but it'll do for now until I can save the money to get a new one.

Blah

Fri, 20 Feb 2009 15:50:10 GMT

So we don't owe $700+ in taxes, there was an error. We instead owe $1300+ in taxes. Yay!!! *ahem*

Chris and I agreed that we need to do something with my car. It hasn't worked in almost a year. I canceled the insurance on it not to long ago and then I get this letter saying that I need to either get insurance on the car or turn in the title. If I don't, my license will be suspended. >_< Why am I going to get insurance on a car that doesn't work?! I've asked Chad if he could take out the speakers and radio that I had gotten for Xmas in 2007 and I might end up junking the car. At least we'll get something for it.

Nonbreaking Point?

Sun, 08 Feb 2009 16:13:54 GMT

Hubby and I got back from doing our taxes yesterday.

We owe $700.

I talked to my dad the other day. He's only working 20 odd some hours at his job. They're not firing people, just cutting their hours. He's trying to take out a loan to help pay for things. I can't help him with money right now and he can't help me.

I feel terrible about my friends/ex-staff all being either fired or quitting and I feel like it's my fault.

I honestly feel that I should be broken right now. But I'm not. Yesterday I was thinking about all of this and on how I should be feeling. But instead hitting the breaking point I got this feeling in my gut that something really good is about to happen. I really hope this is true and not a way for my body to cover up how I really feel.

Crossroad

Wed, 04 Feb 2009 21:29:16 GMT

Tomorrow I have an interview for a cook position at the casino near the apartment. I'm not sure what they pay and I don't know if it's for a restaurant or something more cafeteria style. That is at 10:30 in the morning.

I have an interview at TAG, which is a call/help center that pays $14 an hour, allows overtime and I get 3.5 days off, on Friday at 1:30pm. This will eventually allow me to go to culinary school on my days off.

This is my crossroad. What happens if I get offered both jobs? I'm already planning on telling the chef that I will need the weekend to think about it, but what if I get offered both?

I've never worked in a call center before, But I'm sure I can handle it and it will give me the chance to go to culinary school. And the pay is .90 cents less than what I was making as a store manager at GameStop.

I guess it all depends on how much the cook position pays. Chris says that we can work with $12 an hour, but if I can get $14 at a call center and be able to go to school, shouldn't I do that then?

But what if I get paid well with the cook position, should I just take that, even if it means that I might not be able to go to culinary school?

I HAVE AN INTERVIEW TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thu, 22 Jan 2009 15:41:33 GMT

It's with Einstein's Bagels and the interviewer is the area manager so this could be for a management position.

Not going to hold my breath until I actually get a job, but at least I have an interview tomorrow. :D

PS

Thu, 22 Jan 2009 15:19:39 GMT

I also updated my little writing project that I've been working on here.

Still nothing...

Thu, 22 Jan 2009 15:18:14 GMT

So I am still unemployed and it feels freaking strange. I've put in several applications online and some in person and I've been to one job fair so far. Unfortunately the job fair was a bit weak and the online job fair that they are still having is better than the real life job fair. I've already been denied a few times and I do have an interview next week, but the pay isn't that good. I can actually get a job where Chris works for a dollar more than what the other place wants to pay me.

I've been thinking about joining the military, but after what happened this morning, I'm not sure if I can handle it. See, no job = no health insurance so I am no longer getting my monthly shots for my allergies and asthma. And if you have asthma, they don't accept you into the military. I was actually short of breath this morning due to the cold weather. I still haven't used my rescue inhaler in almost a year, but without health insurance, that might change.

We've also been talking about getting me into culinary school. With less money coming in, I might be able to get a grant/loan that can help me to go to school.

My ex-assistant manager was fired a week after I was and I feel terrible about it. The reason that they gave him was because he was following my policies. I didn't know my policies were so bad and I haven't hear all the details yet. I've been getting the feeling that a few of my ex-employees are avoiding me. I feel terrible for what has happened and it hurts me that I haven't been getting replies back when I text them. I did hear from William the other day who told me that he quit working there.

I just realized that Chris and I have been married for three years today. Well, we had our legal ceremony in the states three years today. We were also married in the Bahamas, where we were actually dressed up and with family on the 24th. Since Chris is off on the 24th, we are going to celebrate it then.

Mon, 12 Jan 2009 16:51:27 GMT

Posted on a message board that I frequent:

I'm still in shock and I don't want to go into details right now, but, I was let go from Gamestop today.

Screw it, so about a month ago we noticed that 4 PsP systems were missing. Yes, I went ape shit and so did my other managers. When something goes missing, we're suppose to move it to shrink right away.I waited 5 days because I thought we would find it. Small ass store and there's boxes everywhere. Course we never find it and come today my district manager comes in to fire me. I asked him if they knew about this issue before, why not let me go in December? He said that they had to look into it. Which I think is bullshit. Way to lead by example, I take 5 days to move an item and you take 5 weeks to fire me. There's already a new manager in the store. My guess is that they wanted to train him first and wait until after the Xmas rush.

I am a tad sad, but more revealed than anything. I hated that town(I grew up there for 19 years), it was a long as drive from home to work, and well, whatever. I'll miss playing the games for free, but there's always Gamefly

So I talked with one of my ex-employees yesterday for about 20 minutes on how bad the store is now. My store is tiny, so we placed all the extra cases from the 360 section and used ps2 in the back. Well, the new manager decided to put them all on the sales floor. So there's 20copies of Madden 06 out on the floor and it looks like crap.

The district manager has also told my old staff that they were not allowed to talk to me. WTF?!

Also, this new manager that's in my old store has only been with the company for 2 months as an assistant manager and has know the district manager for 15 years!!!!!
------------------
So that's what's going on right now in my life. It's been a few days later and I am a bit sad about not working their anymore. I mainly miss the fact that I was dealing with video games and the people that I worked with.

It feels like I am without a safety net right now. I feel free and excited, yet scared of what's to come. Hopefully I can get back into the restaurant/cooking field.

I've been working straight since I was 16 years old. Yes, I have had vacations, but I have never been without a job since 1996. It feels strange.

Cabin Fever?

Tue, 28 Oct 2008 15:14:09 GMT

It's not even the holiday rush yet and I am starting to feel drained/stressed. One of the reason has to be the drama at work. Most of it is just bullshit taken out of proportion. That and/or being stuck in one place for too long, the cabin fever might be setting in for some.

I haven't been out in ages and maybe that's contributing to the cabin fever feeling. The claustrophobic feeling due to the lack of space that I have in my store as well as not getting out and actually doing something. Could be as simple as going out to dinner.

Could I be depressed and not even know it? When I was younger, I knew damn well that I was down, but right now, I'm not sure how I feel. I want to go out, I want all to be well at work, I am tired of driving Chris to work every morning and picking him up at 6pm, I'm tired of listening to music in the car via my tiny speaker that I got free from the expert zone for Microsoft, I just want my radio with an a/v jack in Chris' car. My car is dead and its a waste to have the better radio and speakers in that car. I want to hear my music loud with the windows down. I want to feel pain on my tongue. Half my tongue is still numb, parts of my gum on the left side and my jaw on my left side still hurts and I can't open up my mouth like I used to. It's extremely frustrating.

Wisdom Teeth

Wed, 01 Oct 2008 14:01:20 GMT

The follwing was written by me on 9/25 on Jul's message board.

I was hooked up to machines to watch my heart rate, blood pressure and they put one of those oxygen things in my nose. They gave me an IV and, even though I was awake, I was pretty drugged up during the entire thing. When I was at the cusp of normal and "loopy" a part of me had to tell myself where I was and what was going on. I was actually humming during the entire process. I knew I couldn't talk, so I hummed my replies. It didn't hurt at all, until it was over.

When it was done, I felt out of it and had a bit of motion sickness. I wasn't able to eat/drink 6 hours before and on top of the medicine, I ended up throwing up. I also kept opening and closing my eyes which didn't help the nausea.

They then helped me to a waiting room and my husband was allowed to see me. I puked again.

I was finally able to leave and my husband took a plastic bag just in case I would puke in the car. Which I did as soon as we started to drive home and then as soon as we turned into the parking spot.

Now home, after a few I tried to eat. My husband wanted me to take my first percocet pill before the pain really started up. So I did and while sitting in the living room, watching TV, I puked it up. Our best bet is that it was a mix of the motion on the TV, me opening and closing my eyes and all the meds from the morning.

So later on I got hungry and ate again and took the pill again. This time I went to bed right after. I think I slept for an hour.

I then woke up, watched some TV before going to sleep for the night.

It is now 2am.

My face and inside my mouth is still swollen, my tongue and parts of my mouth are still numb and I have to have an ice pack around my head 24-7.

It hurts still but I want to take before taking the pain pills until morning and until I eat again. There is pain while on the pills, and I really don't know if they are working or not, but the 2nd time that I took them I did feel a bit calmer.

So right now I am tempted to take an advil to help with the swelling. I just don't want to risk the chance of puking again. My husband even has a trash bag on the bed post next to me, just in case.

It's very hard to drink cold things, and when I tried to have some apple juice with the first pill, it hurt like hell.

So now when I want something to drink, I have to leave it out a bit for it to warm up...which is what I am doing now with some Sunny D.

A friend of mine who as been through this before has told me to drink milk because it coasts the stomach and bread. I had both (along with soup) with the second pill.

I am off from work until Sunday, but I have warned my staff that I might have to call in on Sunday, depending on how I feel.

====

So yea, I got my final three wisdom teeth taken care of. It's a week later and today at noon I will going to get the stitches taken out. The left side of my tongue is still numb and I can't even tell if the left side of my gums are still numb or not. I've almost gone through an entire bottle of Advil and it takes me hours to just eat something. I've mostly been eating jello, eggs, oatmeal, pudding, soup and yogurt. It took me an hour and a half on Sunday to eat a cheeseburger from McDonald's.

Good thing is that I am no longer waking up in the middle of the night because of the pain. Instead, when I wake up in the morning, it hurts.

I can't open my mouth all the way and it's a riot when I try to brush my teeth.

I just hope it won't hurt too bad getting the stitches out today and hopefully this numbness on my tongue is not permanent.

The Move

Tue, 12 Aug 2008 18:37:17 GMT

So I was going to go into this long journal entry about moving from our old place to the new one, but honestly, I am too tired to even worry about a long entry. So lets just see what happens.

I took Wednesday - Saturday off for the move. Chris had the same days off, plus Sunday. So here we all, plans set and days off to hopefully have a nice, smooth move. Riiight. We were told that we could get the keys to the new place on Wednesday. So we went to the office to fill out all of the paper work and it turns out that the people who clean the carpet didn't show up and we couldn't get the keys until the next day since they don't hand the keys over if the carpet is wet. So we really couldn't do much on Wednesday, save for clean the old apartment and pack the left overs.

Thursday comes and we head over to the new place. I had to be there all day because we had the cable/net coming over to set things up. We got the keys pretty early. Of course, since we had a few people willing to help us move on Wednesday, of course they were not able to help us on Thursday....or Friday....or Saturday...or Sunday......save for Andrew who helped us with the massive heavy TV (that doesn't want to work atm), William who helped out a HUGE deal and Terry, who helped Chris on Sunday while I was at work.

Our legs were killing us, Ikea messed up on our bed frame, it seemed like Chad (our old roommate) was trying to avoid helping us, we couldn't use Chris' old work van that we wanted, my car only wants to go 30 MPH as I drove it to the new place and the parking here blows. Besides all that, its fantastic to be on our own again. Everything is still in boxes and all we have are two beach chairs to sit in.

I'm still pretty much drained. I had to work all day Sunday, Monday morning and afternoon, Monday night/midnight for Madden 2009 and this morning I had to be at work. I get a full day without work this Thursday. I'll pretty much will be trying to figure out whats in what box.

I am uploading the photos to photobucket for those who do not have MySpace (I am posting this on LJ/DJ as well). The link is here. Let me know if it doesn't work. I would have posted it on Geocities, but it was acting up on me. I am currently uploading the pics, so they might not all be there right after posting this entry.

So this is why I try to stay in my cornor

Thu, 10 Jul 2008 14:22:43 GMT

1. My little writing project (remake if you will from what I did in 1994) was given a little nasty comment. It went along the lines of "that it sucks and I should kill myself". Now I know that people will say nasty things (thats just how the world is) and I know I'm not a terrific writer, but what ever happened to "if you don't have anything nice to say, just don't say it all"?

2. I started to play Halo again after about a week and a half of either just playing with my nephews or not playing it all. The team that I am on (I know all three of them), we lose two ranked matches in a row. So one of the guys mentions that we should just do a social match. So we do. Which sucks. Chris got a little too into the game and after I was killed he just had to mention that I was his wife and he was "mad" that I was killed. Of course this lead some punk 14 year old to continuously hunt me down and to say things like "where's your wife" and "I'm gonna rape her" and so on.

There is a 3, but I just don't feel like talking about it. Let's just say that I might be looking for another job soon. Especially since I am moving father away from my store. I know people commute all the time, but I just don't feel like driving 40 minutes to my store and then get BS from my boss.

On a lighter note, my younger cat is having a blast in the boxes that I got from my store to move.And now he's climbing on my rock band drums.... o.O

Little One

Wed, 18 Jun 2008 17:09:52 GMT

So I found a kitten, who was less than 4 weeks old, at my work Saturday night. Unforantly he died Sunday afternoon. He was so cute. He would sleep on my chest. I drove home with him sleeping on my chest and I even played a round of Halo 3 with him sleeping on me. He would also climb to the back on my neck and fall asleep in my hair. Thankfully we got at least two pictures of him.

Photo 1
Photo 2

Spiffy indeed

Tue, 03 Jun 2008 17:19:07 GMT

Chris and I are planning to move out either at the end of July or the start of August. If its the start of August, we might not have a place to live for a week. You see we're currently living with Chad. Since we're moving out Chad is going to be getting new roommate(s). He's thinking about upgrading into a three bedroom apartment. If that's the case, he'll move out of here on the 1st of August. The place that we want to move into (so far) doesn't have anything open until the 6th of August. But since it is still early we might be able to move out in July, like we want to. We'll find out tomorrow if we're accepted into the apartment complex that we want to live at. Of course its a tad father north than where we are at now.

This past May Chris and I (along with Mike and his friends) met up at the Fla SuperCon. It was already. Too bad we couldn't spend any money and I would have gone for the entire weekend, but I had to work. I have pics up on my My Space page. The voice of Master Shake from Aqua Teen Hunger Force was there, as well as Dante from Clerks.

I got Wii Fit and its pretty good. The first time I used it, my legs started to burn. Of course an item like this cannot be found anywhere and we've been getting heaps of calls from it. It seems that they didn't think Wii Fit would sell as it did in the states. Well, because, you know, we're all fat and lazy here. Same goes for Mario Kart. Still a shortage on Wii systems and it seems that we have used ones, but of course no one wants a used one. I mean, why get a used one when you can get a new one---oh wait you can't find one, can you?

Chris just called.....WE GOT IN!!!!!! The gym there is f'ing HUGE with TVs. Not one TV....not two...but a whole row of them!!!! Link not to their website but still holds information about the place. Spiffy.

Never Ending Car Problems

Tue, 20 May 2008 11:20:43 GMT

A few months ago we buy this 1991 Buick off of my husband's ex-boss's mother. This boss is a friend of my husband's father as well. Car worked fine for a bit but lately, its been acting up. At one point, I had to ask my father to burrow around $700 to fix it. This past Friday my car wouldn't accelerate. Monday morning, it wouldn't go over 30MPH. So we took it to the auto shop and the guy told us that its the transmission going dead, that the car won't shift into third gear.

Of course this couldn't have happen at the worst time. Currently we are saving money to move out on our own (we are living with a friend of ours) at the end of July. To fix the transmission, it will be anywhere from 1000 - 1500 dollars. So right now, we are down to one car.

This would be okay if my husband and I still worked close together. Thats not the case now. Luckily, our roommate works down the street from my husband, so hopefully he will be able to take him to work and I can pick him up from work.

It just pissed me off that after putting money to fix the car, it is acting big time now. The car itself had a good engine, low miles and its strong...its just the transmission that is going bad.

This really blows big time.

So I was in a car accident this morning

Sun, 06 Apr 2008 20:31:34 GMT

Yep. So I was on my way to work and I was getting off of the highway, the intersection that is right off of the highway, its light turned yellow. There was a truck next to me and since it was raining all last night, the ground was wet. She started to go into my lane and as soon as I went over the crosswalk line we collided. Everyone is okay and we did not get the cops nor the insurance involved. I just didn't have the time for it and I didn't need my insure to go up or any other complications that might have happened. My driver's side mirror broke off but I was able to glue it back on. The back door is a bit dented and I think there's a small dent on the front door and the plastic bumper on my driver's side is now missing, but besides all that, its alright. I think I put too much glue on it and I need to clean it up as well as the scuff marks. The intersection is always bad for accidents and bottom line, I'm just glad that everyone was okay. I'm a bit shocked that I;'m not a wreak afterwards, My heart was pounding, but that was about it. I had fun at work and I was really upbeat. Go figure. I took too pics that I'll post in a few. Good thing my car isn't tiny or it could have been worse. I like to call my car "the boat". Lives up to the name, I guess.

Picture 1
Picture 2

March Update...a littke bit of %&^%^%!!

Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:00:34 GMT

OMG, the damn toilet will not stop running!!! I swear, with modern technology, you think there would be something that would rid the world of running toilets!!!

So we're in the third month of the year. Yippie.

I haven't really weighed myself since last time but I have gone down a pant size.

Mom finally called...not me of course, but dad. And of course asked for money. She doesn't have a cell phone anymore and hasn't had a car in ages. She's also living on food stamps. (*&&^%^%$$%!!!!! Course dad, being the Mr Nice Guy that he is, is going to send her some money. But here I am, in my current situation...and I NEVER ask for money from Dad.

Chris is down to part time at his job, so less money is coming in.

My high school reunion is this year (early June) and it'll be well over $150 to attend (for me and Chris).

My car is acting up again.

But here I am, with a job, been working since I was 16 and I am still here, and, well, working my ass off.

So yea, I still have a grudge against my mom. And yea, I am a bit PO'ed that dad is gonna help her out, but whatever, I guess.

And is it so damn hard to find a bra that fits and won't shit out within a month or two?

My social life is still at rock bottom. Had a slight spike during the moon eclipse when Chris and I went with Tim to the Everglades.

No one (that I had invited) came to Chad's party. Andrew and his wife went, plus Chad's friends (some that I knew of) but that was about it. Had fun all the same though.

Going to a hockey game tomorrow night (got free vouchers) with Chris, Andrew and Jackie. Probably gonna head over there right after work.

Chapter Three is up

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 13:33:45 GMT

Took me long enough, but here it is: Chapter Three - Malfunctions.

Numb

Thu, 21 Feb 2008 17:10:33 GMT

Everyday, especially at work, I look into the mirror to see if I am still fat. The answer is always yes and yes I am trying to do something about it. So far I have lost 10 pounds, not enough in my eyes, but at least I am loosing and not gaining. Sadly, I haven't been able to exercise for about a week. This past Tuesday there was a meeting for all the managers in the district and today I went to the dentist to get a few fillings. All are on the right side of my mouth, the side that I chew most with. So right now half my face is numb, both inside and out.